Some Jokes For You
Need a break in your hectic week? Here are some corny jokes that you can share with your family! Have a laugh and feel better – you’re halfway through the week!!!
Q. What do you call a fly that has no wings?
A. A walk.
Q. How does a Rancher count his cattle?
A. With a cowculator.
Q. What do you get when you cross a skunk with a boomerang?
A. A smell you can’t get rid of.
Q. Which side of a dog has the most hair?
A. The outside.
Q. Why don’t turkeys get invited to dinner parties?
A. Because they use fowl language.
Q. What animal drops from the clouds?
Q. What has four legs and goes “Boo”?
A. A cow with a cold.
Q. What do you call fourteen rabbits hopping backwards?
A. A Receding Hareline.
Q. What do you call a baby whale?
A. A little squirt.
Q. What’s a Ducks favorite T.V. show?
A. The Feather Forecast.
Q. What do you get if you cross an Owl and a Skunk?
A. A bird that stinks, but doesn’t give a hoot.
Q. What do you call a flock of ducks playing hide-and-seek?
A. Fowl Play.
Q. How can you tell if a snake is a baby’s?
A. It has a rattle.
Q. What do frogs do with paper?
Q. What lies on the ground, 100 feet up in the air?
A. A sleeping centipede.
Q. Which birds steal soap from the bath?
A. Robber Duckies.
Q. What do you get if you cross a frog and a dog?
A. A Croaker Spaniel.
Q. What fish swims at 100mph?
A. A Motor Pike.
Q. What does an eagle like to write with?
A. A Bald-point pen.
Q. What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
Q. What did the Queen Bee say to the nosy neighbor?
A. “Hey, mind your own bees’ nest!”
Q. Why is “H” the funnest letter?
A. Because it’s at the start of every Holiday.
Q. Why did the traffic light turn red?
A. It was embarrassed to have to change in front of everyone.
Q. What kind of Mexican food can give you frostbite?
A. A Burrr-ito!
Q. Do you file your nails?
A. No, I throw them away.
Q. What’s the difference between a butcher and an insomniac?
A. One weighs a steak and the other stays awake.
Q. Why did the boy throw the butter out the window?
A. He wanted to see a butterfly.
Q. What do you call a Hippie’s wife?
Q. What’s the difference between Roast Beef and Pea Soup?
A. Anyone can roast beef.
Q. What happened to the wooden car with wooden wheels and a wooden engine?
A. It wooden go.
Q. What’s bright orange and sounds like a parrot?
A. A Carrot.
Q. Why did the Cyclops close his school?
A. He only had one Pupil.
Q. What’s Black and White and Red all over.
A. A Newspaper! (or a penguin with a sunburn, or a zebra with a rash . . .)
Q. Who can tell someone where to ‘get off’ and get away with it?
A. A Bus Driver.
Q. What do you get if you cross a bag of chips and a lawnmower?
A. Shredded Treat.
Q. What is worse than seeing a sharks fin?
A. Seeing the sharks tonsils.
Q. What do Trees wear when they go the the pool?
A. Swimming Trunks.
Q. How many witches does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Just one, but she changes it into a toad.